Friendsgiving sign-up sheet: who brings what (a list you can copy)

Published October 31, 2026

Thanksgiving is on 26 November, and Friendsgiving usually lands the weekend before or after. A group chat is where a potluck goes wrong: three people say “I’ll bring something”, nobody says what, and you end up with five desserts and no bread. The fix is a list with categories and a limit on each, where a guest puts their name on a line. Below is a 14-line list for 12 people you can copy, and how to handle the turkey and drinks you’re buying yourself.

What categories does a potluck need?

Mains, sides, bread, a starter, dessert and drinks. Decide how many of each before you send anything. The categories stop the “we all brought mashed potatoes” problem, and the numbers stop the five desserts. These are rules of thumb, not a standard:

For the turkey itself, plan on about 1 lb (450 g) per guest, and more if you want leftovers. If you’re past 15 or so, a second oven or a second main is easier than one giant bird.

How do you stop everyone bringing dessert?

List the dishes you want instead of asking “what will you bring?”. People pick from what’s on the list. If they offer something that’s already taken, ask for what’s still open. Nobody argues with “mashed potatoes are taken, we’re short on a vegetarian main”.

Put a cap in the line itself. “Dessert (2)” means two lines, each with room for one name. When both are claimed, there’s no third dessert to claim. Add one line called “whatever you like” for the friend who insists on bringing something that isn’t on the list.

What does the host provide, and do guests chip in?

The host usually buys the turkey, the drinks and the ice, because they have to be bought in one shop and cooked in one oven. The cost is split between everyone. Guests cover their own dishes and nothing else, so the money question is only about those two or three items.

Is it rude to ask guests to chip in? answers whether to ask and how to word it. Short version: say so in the invitation, with a rough amount, before anyone says yes. The rest of this post is the list.

Friendsgiving for 12: the sign-up list

Here’s the list for 12 people. The host buys two lines (turkey and drinks); guests claim the other twelve.

And the same list as plain text, to paste into the chat:

FRIENDSGIVING, Sat 21 Nov, 7pm. I'm doing the turkey and the drinks.
Reply with ONE line you're taking, first come first served:

Vegetarian main:
Appetizer board:
Mashed potatoes:
Stuffing:
Green bean casserole:
Roasted sweet potatoes:
Cranberry sauce:
Salad:
Gravy:
Rolls and butter:
Pie (pumpkin):
Pie (pecan or apple):

Turkey and drinks come to about $10 each. I'll send the exact number after.
Allergies or a dish that isn't on the list? Tell me and I'll add a line.

The chat version only works if the host updates the list after every reply, and that’s the part people drop.

How much does the host’s side cost each person?

Add up what the host bought and divide by everyone, host included. Say the turkey is $72 and the drinks and ice are $48. That’s $120, so each of the 12 pays $120 ÷ 12 = $10.

The host paid $120 and owes $10, so is owed $110. The other 11 owe the host $10 each. Guests who bring a dish don’t pay for it twice: their dish is their contribution.

Two things to decide before the invitation goes out:

• Is the booze separate? If it’s BYOB, drop line 2 and the share falls to $6 each ($72 ÷ 12).
• Does the host eat free? Some groups say yes, as thanks for the oven. Then it’s $120 ÷ 11 = $10.91 each. Say so in the invite, not at the table.

How do you share the list so people actually claim?

Put it where a guest can put their name next to a line in one tap, and send one link. A screenshot of a list in a group chat doesn’t work, because the host has to do the updating, and by line six they’ve lost track.

In CabuTally, the to-do list is that list. Each line is a to-do, and a guest taps the join button to put their name on it. Names show under the title, and the filters button has a “not claimed” view, so the host sees at a glance what’s still open. Guests join with the event’s link and no account.

A few things it doesn’t do:

• No quantities and no caps. “Dessert (2)” is two lines, as above. For “three bags of ice”, put it in the title.
• Being on a to-do doesn’t mean paying. The host’s turkey and drinks are expenses, split between everyone; a guest’s dish is a name on a line. You can log what a dish cost, but you don’t have to.
• The estimate is for planning. Put $72 on the turkey and $48 on the drinks and the budget bar shows where the shop will land. It never changes the balances; those come from what was actually logged.

Start this Friendsgiving in CabuTally: the name, the $120 budget and the currency are filled in. Add the lines from the list above as to-dos, share the link, and when the dinner is over, the host logs the two real receipts and the app works out who owes what. How settling works.

What if someone doesn’t claim anything?

Ask them directly for a specific line, not “can you bring something?”. The person who doesn’t reply to the group often says yes to “could you take the rolls?”. If they can’t cook, give them ice or the washing-up. A dish isn’t the only way to contribute.

If a line is still open two days before, the host decides: buy it, move it to someone who offered, or drop it. A dinner with seven sides is still a dinner.